Sunday, August 5, 2012


Wikipedia says a shadow is: an area where direct light from a light source cannot reach due to obstruction by an object.
an object, or attitude, or unexpected change in plans, or loss of work...many things can cause a shadow.

we didn't see it coming, living life like the Joneses, day after day...wondering if this is really what life at it's fullest is all about.

and then it happened. out of the blue, without even one day notice, without even an inkling from Him, life as we knew it was no longer.

me standing by the stove, kids inevitably at my feet or at each other, the soft whir of the garage door opens, his return lightens all loads, immediately...until i see that look, "He doesn't need me any more."

silence, soul-stilling silence.

my mind is set into overdrive as i stand stirring and can he not be are we going to fix can this be happening...why!!??

the days went on and so did our wondering and why-ing, our stewing and did this fit in to our grand plans? why is this happening if we feel like our life is made for so much more?

the weeks went on and so did our questions and pleas, figuring that should we "know" the "reasons" as to why it would make the waiting easier...
"How long oh Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?" Psalm 13:1
our hope dwindled, our joy extinguished, our faith stretched to points beyond...
the days and weeks turned into months and months and we began to bow low our heads, hang up our need to understand, put away our methods of figuring, and sought first His kingdom...

we don't know the reasons, we don't know the end result, but we are convinced we know He who knows.

and like bulbs weathered throughout the winter, doing most of their development in the shadow of earth, we emerge...

out of the dark, out from under the shadow, and with time we grow and BLOOM.

it's those dark days. the days that you never foresee, the days that - with hindsight - seem to all blend in to one dark shadow, those days when hope dwindles and faith experiences growing pains, that you look back on and realize:

Who would even know the greater graces of comfort and perseverance, mercy and forgiveness, patience and courage, if no shadows fell over a life? ~One Thousand Gifts


kelly ens said...

love you guys!!!